"Mr. Morality" Mitt Romney
Drogan's Encyclopedia - We Ain't Wikipedia
| Born | Willard Mitt Romney |
| March 12, 1947 | |
| Detroit, Michigan, US | |
| Political Party | Never Trumper |
"Mr. Morality" Mitt Romney (born March 12, 1947), is Senator from Utah and a very moral person. Just ask him, he'll tell you. Everything he does comes from his moral code.
Governor of Massachusetts
Mr. Morality was the governor for a period of time that no one really cares about. The only thing of note was him passing the landmark legislation that forced everyone in the state to purchase health insurance. This legislation had the distinction of providing the model for Obamacare.
Presidential Nominee
Mr. Morality ran and won the Republican nomination for the United States President. Unfortunately, he won. Then he lost to Obama. You know, the President who helped get Obamacare passed. You know, Obamacare, the law that forced all Americans to buy health insurance. You know, the one modeled after the one created by Governor Mitt Romney. Yeah, great choice Republican party.
Trump Nomination
During the lead up to the Republican primary for US President, Mr. Morality was highly critical of Donald Trump. He talked about how immoral Trump is. Being the expert on morality, Mr. Morality was the one to champion morality and virtue. Mr. Morality also questioned Trump's business ethics and made the claim that Trump isn't as rich as he says he is. Some have questioned Mr. Morality's criticism, pointing out that, as a founder of Bain Capital, he seemed to conduct business in questionable ways.
After Trump won the nomination, and the subsequent election in 2016, Mr. Morality suddenly changed his tune. Mr. Morality said that Trump was a great businessman, and was much better a businessman than he. Mr. Morality let Trump know he was available for a cabinet position and would be glad to serve in that capacity.
After being turned down for a cabinet position, Mr. Morality did another 180 and claimed that Trump was a failed President who has bad instincts.
Many have pointed out that Mr. Morality's duplicity is the antithesis of morality. Some question if this deceitfulness would disqualify him from becoming the god of his own planet in the afterlife.
Senator from Utah
After failing to get a real job, Mr. Morality moved to Utah to run as a senator to replace the retiring Orrin Hatch. After fooling the people of Utah, Mr. Morality won the election.
To date, the only things of note that Mr. Morality has accomplished is to vote to remove Trump from office, twice. Again, Mr. Morality talked about how moral and religious he was, and that forced him to make him to vote the way he did.
Turncoat
Mr. Morality has continued to show that he is, most likely, a paid consultant for the Lincoln Project. Although Mr. Morality calls himself a Republican when he is running for office and raising donations, he actively campaigns for "Independent" candidate Egg McMuffin. The "independence" of McMuffin has been called into question since he receives most of his campaign financing from ActBlue, the PAC that raises money for Democrats.
Self-Aggrandizing Quotes Regarding "Mr. Morality's" Morality
"The personal consequences, the political consequences, that fall on me as a result of that are going to be extraordinary. But I swore an oath before God—and I'm a religious person—that I would apply impartial justice. And applying impartial justice said what the president did was grievously wrong. And I had to vote—if I was going to live with my own conscience—in a way that was consistent with that oath of office."